Isla Sorna
by Nagi
Summary: Um... the Schwarz boys get stuck on a prehistoric island (or one that seems like it, anyway. o.O;) Will they survive?! Please R&R n.n;


*Lol... this is a comedy fanfic... that.. um... my friend came up with but didn't want to write. Bwahaha. XD I dun own Weiss Kruez... o.o; Beware of insanity.*  
  
  
  
Once upon a time there was a group of assassins named Schwarz and they wanted a vacation so they bought tickets to an exotic island. Really, really, really, really far away. Everything was fine when they got on the plane... but then it crashed on a forbidden island really, really, really, really far away from the island they wanted to go to (but it was really, really, really, really far away from where they took off. Go figure...).  
  
"..Goddamn fucking assholes don't know how to fly a friggin' plane... God fucking damn it." Schuldich grumbled as the other three climbed out of the plane (which was currently engulfed in flames). "And just where the FUCK are we?!"  
  
Then a really big sign popped down from a really, really big tree and it said, in big, bold letters, "WELCOME TO ISLA SORNA." Then in really, really, really, really, really small font it read "You will probably die here but you can't sue us for any damage done because we already told you what would happen and you'd be dead anyway. FUCKERS!!! Besides, Ingen is out of business. Too many lawsuits."  
  
"I bet that hurt God... I be he's crying." Farfarello inquired, without knowing that God actually -was- crying. "Let's do it again!"  
  
Nagi blinked and raised a brow, "Someone please tell him that God doesn't exist.."  
  
That comment was returned with a glare from the American and a word or two from the German, "Shh," Schuldich said, "Don't... he spends too much time hurting God, don't make all that work go down the drain you dumbass!"  
  
Farfarello perked up, though he was still in a slouching position, and turned his head around as far as it would go, "Did... you hear that?" He asked the others, a playful smirk crossing those chapped lips of his.  
  
And then a dinosaur ran out of the bushes, roaring like all hell. And just to prove his power he lowered his head infront of Farfarello and roared REALLY loudly... drool and spit went everywhere... which left a *really* pissed Farfarello who lept onto the neck of the dino (which was a t-rex..a baby one. ;), pulled out his knife and started stabbing at it. "YIYIYIYIYIYIYIYIYIYIYIYIYIYIIIIIIIIIIIIII!! DIE YOU BASTARD!!"  
  
"What the FUCK is THAT?!" Schuldich screamed while tugging on the arm of Nagi.  
  
"Shut up and RUN!" Nagi exlaimed while turning on his heel and heading in the north direction.  
  
Crawford blinked as the dino's head ripped past him and he felt a breeze. He glanced down and screamed, "HE ATE MY PANTS!!!!"  
  
Farfarello managed to take down the dino with that one single knife, though he was covered in blood and sweat and... other icky gooey stuff that no one knows of. He then snickered and jumped off the dead dino as it fell, "Oh yeah, that hurt God." He was quite proud of himself for taking down the dino... but he didn't linger, he ran after the others.  
  
God cried. He cried a lot... and was really starting to really hate Farfarello. Really.  
  
They all paused as they heard a rumbled.  
  
"Shit!" Schuldich said, "Mommy is *very* angry..." He blinked as he watched a jeep fly over his head (No one knows where the jeep came from. :D It was just there to add...stuff... ;).  
  
Just then two big....er, really big T-rexes jumped out of the bushes and looked at their dead baby.  
  
"QUICK!" Crawford yelled, "Schuldich, use your mind powers to make it think that the baby's a worm or something!!!"  
  
Nagi turned to look at the dinos, screamed, and ran into a tree which caused him to pass out.  
  
"Oh...right.." Schu blinked and used some of his spiffy powers.  
  
/You are not mad.../ He thought to the dinos. /You are hot, sexy bitches who need to make love to eachother because that dead baby dino isn't even worth your tears. It was pathetic. It. Ate. Dirt. Make a new one!/  
  
...And then the dinos got jiggy-wid-it... (o.O;;;;)  
  
*End of chapter one because I said so.. and.. Um.. other stuff. Not that it matters. o.O; Besides, the chapter was supposed to be short so that I can make lots of little chapters which will (in turn) make the whole ficcie seem really, really, really long!!!! REALLY!!* 


End file.
